divine moments in my "ordinary" day

My day started at 3:30 a.m. when I woke up to exercise for the second time since I had surgery in January.

Apparently, my body was mad at me. My tummy was hurting, and I don't think it's supposed to. :o(

I've been uncomfortable all day, but I'll live. I was anxious to work out again because I like endorphins. ;o) I also like wearing smaller sizes. Alas, I will need to wait a bit longer to enjoy them.

Since I was already awake, I did some laundry before showering and going to Giant Eagle to get some bananas for breakfast and cheese and soybeans for my salad. (Have you ever sprinkled soybeans on your salad? Yummo!)

Then I went to 6:00 a.m. prayer...which was fantastic! I actually sat with a pastor who prayed about folks who allow themselves to get so busy that they can't feel the pain from the past, from loneliness, etc.

He was praying for me but probably didn't know it.

Then, when I got to work, I was called upstairs because someone wanted to pray. Sadly, a friend's wife had an aneurysm and is currently on life support. Please pray for George and his wife.

I've been incredibly stressed out lately, and for some reason God has chosen to allow me to be single. That's fine, but there are days when I want to pull my hair out. I don't think anyone has a clue how stressful it is to be a single mom (or single dad). I can't even describe the frustration, disappointment and heartache that my children have seen, but I'm trying to be a wonderful mom. I don't want to merely "get by" or "make it." I want my children to have the life God had planned for them from the beginning of time.

Any single moms reading this? You know what I'm talking about, don't you? There are days when I simply don't have the energy to make dinner, which is why I have built-in "free days" in my budget. We don't go to nice restaurants except for special occasions. That way, I can feed them more often, even when I'm tired. Taco Bell has become a favorite because I can get a salad (but it's soooo hard not to eat the fattening shell)!

I would never trade being a mother for anything in the world! However, I know that this isn't what God had in mind when he created parenting. My boys need a relationship with their Dad, and I'm praying that he will start developing that with both of them soon. Yes, he's helping financially, but I'm talking about giving of his time.

I'm saying all of this to make a point: I'm exhausted. So I decided to treat myself to a bargain book at a local Christian bookstore which happens to be down the street from my job. The cashier said they just "happened" to stock the top two shelves this afternoon and priced them all at $0.99 each!

That's when I saw Angela Thomas' face.

I picked up her book, and read just the first few pages. One bit of advice she shares is that the reader, whether he or she is a single parent or not, would show compassion the next time a single mom is in view. She also said to tell her she is beautiful!

See? I'm not the only single mom feeling rejected and not-so-attractive! I'm sorry that this woman felt the same emotions I've been feeling, but I'm also glad that she wrote about them. I'm feeling more "normal" than ever!

I will enjoy the rest of her book tomorrow. I should be able to finish it at work when my students are typing the final drafts of their research papers.

I also got to spend a few minutes with my pastor. If I were in a better mood, I would have chatted for a few more minutes. The last thing I want to do, though, is suck him dry (like I've done in the past). Maybe we'll talk another day.

Do they call it "sweet 16" if you're a guy? Well, my son turned 16 today, but we had already planned to go to dinner on Thursday since I had obligations tonight and tomorrow. Still, I wanted to give him something, so I brought him (and child #2) an Oreo McFlurry. We'll be able to celebrate soon! I'll try to take pictures since I haven't uploaded any in a while.

God, you touched so many areas of my life in such a short span of time! Thank you for your compassion and love! I love you back, Father. Be with me, Lord, as I continue to learn, grow, and heal. I need you to hold my tongue when I want to fuss, move me to hug and pray for those who are hurting, and forgive as you call all of us to do on a regular basis.

In Jesus' name, amen!

p.s. - Every now and then, I'll type a post and not proofread at all due to a time constraint or some other responsibility. Tonight, I'm just sleepy. Forgive my mistakes, ok? Thanks!