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Good morning!
I only have one resolution for 2009: to become a better woman, whatever that looks like.
I have been in physical pain off and on since last week because of my own stupidity. I was feeling rather well, and for a moment I forgot that I recently had surgery. As I straightened the office at church, I saw an unopened box of copy paper that had been sitting on a desk for a few days. Without thinking, I picked it up and carried it to the counter to put the reams in the cabinet.
You can probably figure out the rest.
I have been trying to rest this week, and I'm afraid to exercise because I don't want to feel any more pain. Maybe I'll start walking next week.
Weight loss is usually my only goal, but this year it will only be part of my journey. I'm still going to cook healthy meals and try to stay away from fattening foods, but exercise needs to be a daily part of my routine too.
My boys have lost quite a bit of weight because of their active lifestyles and my conscious effort this year to buy foods that will nourish our bodies. In fact, I'm so blessed when they go to the store with me. Instead of asking for chips or candy, they beg for yogurt and strip cheese! (Really! I'm not making this up!)
Last night I didn't feel particularly well, so I made a simple dinner. I cooked the leftover Christmas turkey in a pan with two tablespoons of canola oil, some Mrs. Dash seasoning, and a jar of roasted red bell peppers, which I sliced. I didn't use any salt or butter. I poured that mixture over some noodles, and voila! We enjoyed a healthy, easy to make, quick supper. My boys LOVED it!
I have already begun reading my Bible more often, and I'm enjoying my time with God. I definitely need to continue spending time with him, even when life gets hectic.
I loved preaching on Sunday, so I'm hoping that I'll get to do that again in 2009. If not, the ladies at church will keep me busy with the women's Bible study. They are wonderful, and I love them dearly.
What will you focus on in the new year?
Isn't God magnificent?
My self-esteem before and after my divorce was utterly destroyed. I thank God for J. and K., two of my guy friends (yes, just "friends") who've done wonders to help my heart heal. I'm a short, chubby, mixed chick, but they made me feel more beautiful than ever.
Yes, I have girlfriends, but these two gentlemen helped me feel like a woman again (not just Mom, teacher, or music director). I don't think they have any idea how much their attention, affection and kindness have impacted me this year. Knowing them was definitely part of God's perfect timing.
I don't think that either is "the one," nor am I looking for that anymore. I'm simply enjoying my life, a rich one filled with people who love me. I don't know what it feels like to be cherished by a husband, and I have accepted the real possibility that I never will. Being single is ok with me now, but it took a long, seemingly endless time to get to this point. I'm a good, loving, affectionate person, a whole person, with or without a sweetheart.
I thank God for my health too. I had a scare with uterine cancer, and the doctor will be watching me carefully to make sure those durn cells stay non-cancerous....but I'm cancer free! Yay! I only need meds, and my health insurance covers it. THAT is definitely a blessing too.
I am on my way toward being debt-free. Several problems have happened at no fault of my own, but I have enough to take care of my boys.
When my lease is up, I'd like to buy a cheap but dependable used car and eliminate a monthly payment. Then I'd like to double my student loan payments so that I can pay it off earlier than planned. I've already been building a little nest egg for myself, so I'll have a nice chunk of cash when I retire.
What ideas has God been giving you? How has he healed your heart? I pray that he continues to move in your life in a real and powerful way!
Well hello there!
How are you?
I'm happy to the core!
I have an entire week off (in addition to next Saturday and Sunday) before I must return to work, and it's heavenly to relax in a clean house.
I have trouble "wasting" days. Multi-tasking, at times, was the only way I could finish anything; therefore, it has somewhat become a habit.
I will try not to commit myself to so many roles in the new year.
I have already begun a different routine that includes reading my Bible daily. Sadly, there were quite a few days this year when I got so tired that I went to bed without a devotional. Now I'm beginning my day with some quiet time, and it's working much better!
I'm a morning person anyway...what was I thinking?
Thankfully, the sermon yesterday was anointed. I'm so glad God was by my side; otherwise, it would have flopped and my voice would have been shaking. I'm pleased to say that God received all of the glory, and that's how I wanted it.
There were tears on many faces as I tried to continue speaking, but God is gonna do his thing, isn't He? Although I wanted folks happy while I "preached," He wanted them healing. His way is better, eh? ;o)
My friend, Leon, said, "You know, I didn't know what to expect, but I gotta say I'm pleasantly surprised!"
Me too.
I'm also looking forward to preaching again!
Prayer time: THANK YOU God for my wonderful, supportive, loving, encouraging church family! We're a tight-knit group of folks who simply want to love you, Jesus. Please help us to grow! We want to listen to your voice more often, and we truly desire to please you.
I delayed beginning a women's ministry because I thought I wasn't ready, but you proved me wrong. I've also been running from a more in-your-face kind of ministry, but I think I did ok yesterday because you spoke through me. As long as I remember that it's about YOU and not me, then I'll be fine!
If you want me to go to seminary, then I'm willing. You'll also have to provide the resources to do that, but I'm not worried. I trust you.
Thank you for the opportunity to minister to your people yesterday. I was exhausted on the way home, but that's what happens after a spiritual battle, isn't it? Strengthen me, the pastor, the leadership, and your people! Remind us of our identity, that we are sons and daughters of the most high God! Sometimes we forget that when circumstances seem unbearable. In Jesus' name, amen.
I feel MUCH better!
I'm not as spastic as I was this afternoon, and for that I'm grateful to God.
It's time to get some shut-eye.
See ya in the mornin'!
I just put the finishing touches on my sermon for tomorrow.
I'm terrified.
It takes an average of 17 minutes to deliver this message, which means it'll be about 4 minutes if I'm still scared tomorrow morning!
I will slow down...I will slow down....I will slow down...
I'm in front of 166 kids every day without being nervous, but this is WAY different.
I'll let you know how it goes.
Pray for me, eh? Thanks a bunch!
I'm grateful for an interesting 2008, a year filled with opportunities for spiritual and emotional growth and healing. Amazingly, it has been fulfilling despite some obstacles along the way:
1. I experienced a stressful divorce, although there was no "fighting." I waited almost a year for him to come home, and in that time my children and I didn't know if he was dead or alive. I have learned that you can't have a marriage if only one person works at making the relationship work.
2. I felt acutely unwanted and unattractive when my husband left me, yet I've had more than a few folks comment on my youthful/beautiful appearance (even in the hospital on the day of my surgery when I looked a hot mess since I wasn't allowed to wear makeup). I have learned that, in the eyes of some of my closest friends, I am already beautiful and, sadly, not the only woman who has experienced this kind of pain.
3. Despite feeling alone at certain moments, I still feel blessed by some wonderful friendships. I have learned to say, "I'm scared!" or "I need help!" or "I need a hug!" I no longer try to be all things to all people; that's impossible and makes me feel neurotic. :o)
4. When many students are failing at once, I take that personally, like it's "my" failure. I have learned that a "good" teacher isn't necessarily the one who gives everyone an A. The students who want to receive what I'm trying to give them are doing well, and that's all I can ask.
As we begin a new year together, I will keep my eyes open for even more opportunities to grow and apply spiritual principles to my life. Isn't it exciting to watch how God brings balance even in the midst of chaos? He's so thoughtful and compassionate, especially when we feel disappointed.
May we accept not only God's blessings but also every chance to move outside of our comfort zones in the new year. I'm looking forward to seeing what God has in store for me. What about you? May the Lord bless you, my friend. I love you, you know; you're not alone...ever.
Happy new year!
Where to start?????
Um, I never made cookies as planned because I accidentally got trapped by the t.v. last night. [I adore a good love story, especially with a Christmas theme.]
So now I'm behind.
Way behind.
It'll all get done, though. I'll just need to stay focused this morning. On my to-do list:
1.) Bake cookies
2.) Finish cleaning the house [child #1 and child #2 will definitely help with that one]
3.) Do some laundry in-between other chores
4.) Call my nephew and give him a B-I-G thank-you for sending some awesome presents to my kids.
5.) Go to church and practice pastor's solo for Christmas Eve [I'll practice all of the songs while I'm there]
I finished paying bills this morning, and I'm sooooooo grateful to God! He just keeps blessing me. I don't have a lot by society's standards, but I certainly have more than enough to feel satisfied. I hope your home is filled with love and happiness as you bustle through the activities that lead up to enjoying Christmas with your family.
And the best news of all: I do NOT have cancer! Yay! Yes, I have abnormal cells that could turn into uterine cancer, but I can't waste my time worrying about that. Instead, I'm going to praise God for touching me and allowing me to be treated with some meds instead of surgery/chemo/radiation like my sister. Thank you, Father!
I pray that you have peace and smiles all year! Merry Christmas!
I'm not your typical girl:
I do NOT like shopping.
Fortunately, I finished buying Christmas presents today; I spent very little (less than $200 INCLUDING Christmas dinner...not bad, eh?).
I usually make sugar cookies and deliver them as Christmas presents to friends and family. This year, though, I decided to buy a few gifts, especially for my very young nieces.
Those girls (ages 3 and 4) love to raid my purse every time I visit them. They are so cute! Both of them love lip gloss and finger nail polish, so I bought them their own. ;o) Along with other goodies, the gloss and polish are inside a purse for each of them: one is gold, the other black.
I plan on making sugar cookies either tomorrow or Monday before a doctor's appointment. I can frost them on Tuesday and get a head start on Christmas dinner. Christmas at our house is VERY laid back; in fact, it's also known as "pajama day." My boys and I stay in our jammies (jogging outfits) and lounge around, play board games, watch t.v., and of course eat.
My Mom and brother will come over, but they probably won't stay very long.
I get to deliver the sermon next Sunday, so I'll pro'ly spend some time this week tweaking and practicing what I've written. My pastor can preach without notes, but I'll have to work up to that. I can teach English lessons without notes every day, but this is different. I want to make sure I share exactly what God gave me last week without getting side-tracked, so I will have my notes in front of me the whole time.
Have a fantastic evening! I love you!
Today started off pretty badly.
I average grades weekly so that my students have an idea of how well (or how poorly) they're doing. This morning, though, was depressing: 72 folks are failing or close to failing my class.
Hmph.
However, I can honestly say that I am doing all that I can to help them succeed. The ones who want to meet success are doing so, and I must focus my attention on them when I feel discouraged by the others.
Overall, I am quite content with my life. I enjoy my church family, I love not only my biological children but also the kids in my classroom, and my friends bless me every day.
Life is good!
Today I desperately needed some adult conversation, and I got it!
I also needed some hugs, and I got those too. What made that so enjoyable is that I didn't need to ask; several folks simply walked up and gave me the most awesome hugs ever. [Thanks, God!]
A friend of mine asked if I wanted to go out this evening, so I did. What a fabulous night!
Tomorrow will be wonderful simply because it will start with the worship service at church. After that, I will go to a Christmas party with a friend, and I should be home by 6:00 to do laundry and grade some papers.
It sounds hectic, but my schedule is actually lovely. I hope your Sunday is special!
I spent the entire evening with firstborn son, and it was so much fun!
When I was still at work, my little one called to ask permission for Grandma to take him out to dinner. When I asked if child #1 was going, I could hear him in the background saying, "No, I'm not."
So I decided to spend some time with him. We went to dinner, spent an hour looking at cards at Gorant's and opening every musical card we could find. [I'm sure that made the Gorant people quite happy.]
Once during dinner he said, "You know, Mom, you are really beautiful now."
That part was really nice, but I couldn't help but wonder "As opposed to what?"
Then he said, "I saw pictures of you when I was little, and you looked, well, gay."
Niiiiiiice.
I laughed, but he's probably right. I LOVE really short hair because it's so dang easy to take care of. With my naturally curly hair, I didn't even need a comb! All I did was wash it, put some Paul Mitchell awapuhi leave-in conditioner in, run my fingers through my hair once, and voila! Ready to go to work! :o)
On the way home, he said, "You know, Mom, I actually had fun. I enjoyed hangin' out with you!"
That, my friends, is one of the best gifts my kid could give me.
Hi, folks!
I have smiled non-stop for the last 2 1/2 hours! My niece, Lina, had me cracking up! We laughed so much that tears were in our eyes!
What a fantastic way to get ready for bed! :o)
Hi, ladies!
How are ya? I'm hanging in there, but I have a little prayer request.
As you may know, I haven't been feeling well since February, but I finally went to the doctor.
I didn't like the expression on his face as he tried to explain my options. [Sorry, Doc, but I think you would suck at poker!] I asked him to tell me bluntly what's going on with my body.
He said that I may have cancer and proceeded to explain all of my options, the risks of surgery, etc. I'm already scheduled for a small procedure next Wednesday. He didn't want me to panic (ummm... ok....I won't panic...), and I'm waiting for his office to call with the results from the biopsy. If they're positive for cancer, then I need another surgery as soon as possible, which means my Christmas/New Year holidays will be spent recuperating.
There's still good news here: even if I have cancerous cells, it's curable with an operation. Yay! More good news: I have wonderful insurance, and I'll hardly notice the medical bills. ;o)
[I'm trying to stay upbeat here...see????]
I'm sure I'll be fine, no matter what happens. I find myself freaking out at times, though. That's when I just need a hug; I hope I get lots of them in the next couple of weeks.
I need a hug right now, but the only ones nearby are my kids. They don't know all the gory details; they just know I'm sick. My Mom has her own health issues to worry about; I wish I just had someone to hold me for a second.
Hug me when you see me, k?
It's DEFINITELY time to pray:
God, I know I'm not the only person to deal with such a devastating piece of news from a doctor, and I'm very grateful that surgery is an option. So I'm sorry for bothering you, but please take away this fear. I don't want this to occupy every waking moment; it's hard for me to concentrate at work too. Thanks for healing me, if that's what you choose to do! If not, then I accept that too. Please guide the surgeon's hands next week.
Thanks for my life, Lord! It's a good one, and I love every minute of it. Use me to bless others, God. Instead of letting me start a pity party, I pray that you give me opportunities to minister to other women in the days to come. Let me enjoy your presence during my private prayer/worship times, and please bless the folks who are reading this prayer. We love you, Lord. In Jesus' name, amen.
I'll keep praying for myself, and I will continue to pray for you too, as always. Thanks for thinking of me today. Take care, and God bless! Remember: God is good ALL the time!!!!!
Thanksgiving may be over, but I'm still going to make an effort to keep a grateful attitude. Today was a blessing! Here's a little bit of what I've experienced today:
1.) My students were PHENOMENAL!!!! They paid attention to a short lesson and then tried their best to apply what I illustrated for them.
2.) The women's Bible study went incredibly well! I LOVE when they're pondering new concepts, thinking about ways in which the lesson applies to their lives, and asking questions when ideas don't seem to make sense. Tonight for a few minutes they were the teachers as they gave me some advice on some personal issues. This group of ladies is amazing.
3.) After the Bible study, I spent a few minutes chatting with our Pastor. Believe it or not, God had the women discussing the same ideas that Pastor was contemplating in his office during our Bible study. Cool, eh?
4.) When I walked into the house, a big gift from my friend, Kim, was waiting for me on the kitchen table. THANK YOU, Kim! These are my first two Christmas presents! As soon as I figure out what I did with my digital camera, I'll post some pictures. Your present will be in the mail shortly...I just have a little bit more to crochet. I hope you like the colors!
Those are the blessings from my day in a nutshell. God is wonderful, isn't He?
